I am very excited to bring back to show my brilliant and gorgeous friend, Arriane Alexander. Arriane is a Rock Your Life Coach who helps female entrepreneurs and business women create a life and career they’ve alway dreamed of.
Not gonna lie, I really did not have a clue where this interview was heading #wingingit, but it turned out to be one of those awesome interviews that just flows. We were on a roll!
(Not yet familiar with my soul sister Arriane? Check out Ep#119 Flex Your Confidence Muscle and Rock Your Life with Arriane Alexander )
Here’s What We Talked About:
- How victim mentality will prevent us from achieving success and how we can learn to own our blame to live happier and more confident lives.
- Why we are so over committed and how to learn to pace our lives so we can actually achieve our goals and stop stressing ourselves out.
- How to recognize the patterns in your life that are limiting your potential and how to forgive yourself and start letting go of our limiting beliefs to reach our goals.
Playing The Blame Game:
Sister, we have all played victim. I’ve done it. Arriane’s done it. You’ve done it.
Sad part is, we didn’t really know we did it until the awareness of the situation settled in…
But have we EVER benefited from playing the blame game? Truth be told, it is a game we will NEVER win. Imagine going into the ring with Mike Tyson.
Yeah, you aren’t gonna make it out on top or without a few scars (let those scars serve as reminders to never challenge a world champion boxer to a match).
Nobody is perfect and that is okay! Sister, there is nothing wrong with looking back at situations (whether they were relationships or workplace drama) and think about what we could have done and how we could have prevented them. Looking back is actually extraordinarily beautiful because we can learn from our past experiences to shape better futures.
If we are still blaming someone, we are not empowered, and we deserve much more than feeling helpless #selflove.
Empowered actions don’t come from feeling victim to situations or circumstances.
Things outside of us can upset us and control us. But if we live in ownership, then we see that no one but our self has the power to make us feel a certain way.
Not gonna lie. Ownership may suck at times. I mean, really sucks but has medicine ever tasted good?
We can choose to play the victim, or we could choose to learn from those experiences, and approach future situations differently, in a manner that could produce a better outcome for us.
The win of owning our blame is when we can look back on our life experiences and learning. Life is a learning process and we might never stop learning. That is not a bad thing.
Setting The Pace:
Have you ever just felt completely overcommitted and overwhelmed.
Sister, we are all over-committed. But why?
We want to have it all and have it all now.
Can we? Yes, absolutely, we just need to define what ALL is and we can’t do that until we slow down from the hustle and bustle of life.
Slowing down is imperative even while it seems so counter-intuitive. However, something beautiful happens when we slow the pace; we start to gain clarity and the next steps to achieving our goals become clear.
Setting our own pace and dictating our own internal pace opens up space for life to show you something even more extraordinary.
We create space for inspiration and clarity to come in.
Patterns in Patterns:
Ever date the same guy over and over again and break up for the exact same reason only to date him again thinking it will be different?
Yup. Sister. I relate.
Patterns show up all over our lives.
How do we recognize these patterns that are bringing us down?
Drink a glass of wine, grab a journal and see what’s not working.
And figure out why its not working and who is at fault for it not working
If it’s the same situation over and over and it’s always someone else’s fault
It’s actually a place to take responsibility and ownership in your own pattern.
It’s not them in a pattern, it’s us creating the pattern over and over again with the same behaviors.
THIS NEEDS A DIFFERENT LEAD IN (You can get more of Arriane’s stem sentence practices www.arrianefreebie.com. Sister, take advantage of this FREE resource!(
SO WHAT’S NEXT AFTER YOU SEE THE SPIDER WEB OF PATTERNS?
When we do this we can start forgiving ourselves and start reframing our experiences. When we recognize these patterns and shift our perspectives we can stop buying into beliefs that limit us and our capacity.
Seeing these patterns is not just recognizing that there are patterns to be recognized but learning from these patterns and changing your reactions. Is your champagne glass half empty or half full? Sister, it’s all perspective and how we learn from our experiences to shape our future.
Sister, life can be overwhelming and unclear no one or anything has the power to make us feel anything we do not want to feel.
We can empower ourselves daily and change our outcomes to achieve our goals and our transformation by taking ownership where it’s due and recognizing the patterns that hold us back. That’s empowerment to take action from and truly feel confident in who you are and what you are
PS> If you are feeling overwhelmed, overcommitted, and really unmotivated to achieve your transformation, you can check out my book The Sexyfit method here. You will find tips and tricks to holding yourself accountable and training your mind to achieve your goals.
How To Bust Through Your Limiting Beliefs 4-Part Video Series
Arriane’s website: www.arrianealexander.com
Sexyfit Private Community on Facebook: Surround yourself with people who believe in you, become a part of Sexyfit Group today. Join in at www.sexyfit.com/community